A vs B... no, A = B!

 i've been wondering what is my definition of bestfriend. bcs sometimes i think that A deserves to be my bestfriend as A knows everything about me whilst B doesnt somehow but i call A as my soulmate and B as my bestfriend.

why?

it took me some time to realise the fact that B, thruout our 4 years of friendships ever since the first day we met i'd say, B had been receiving countless of shits from me. I threw tantrums at B, i fought with B for most of the time, i gave B my cold shoulder, i treated B like a piece of trash at times depending on my mood, i demanded a lot of things from B but B never left. B remained patience. B stayed by my side thruout our degree journey and would still reconcile whenever we could. B tried to understand me even when I gave B a hard time. overall i could say that B truly received all the bad sides of me, legit all.

but A is also another dear friend of mine. we have known each other since high school which explains it has been a decade, our friendship i mean. but it's very rare for me to show the bad sides of me to A. i dont have the strength to be mad at A, i got no courage to throw tantrum at A if my mood is not stable, i will never be able to be extremely emotional to A because i am afraid if A couldnt handle it and A might find me scary so i usually show A the good sides of me. i want A to be happy whenever i am around instead of feeling stressful.

im not saying that A isnt as good as B to the point i never showed A my ugly personality. but it's more to i couldnt bear to hurt A but i'm more than okay to hurt B hahahahaha because no matter how awful our argument could be, we would still make it up with each other. perhaps i could conclude it this way, i treasure both of them equally but in different ways. i might not call A as my bestfriend but A is undeniably my soulmate whom i'll always turn to in whatever situation i'm in. B on the other hand is my bestfriend but can never be my soulmate because euw? hahahaha.

yknow it feels good to have friends who love you for who you are. the fact that they choose to stay even when they have many reasons to leave, my heart... i'm touched.

Thank you A and B for being my favourite friends! not to forget, my other close friends too who never failed to be by my side through countless of ups and downs. i'm forever indebted to all of you. may The Almighty bless our friendships and may we get to reunite in the Highest Heaven, my darling friends! <3

Love,

Greenish Moon